This isn't so much a conspiracy theory as an observation- Big Brother is Watching My Uterus.
I know that makes me sound a little like a crackpot who's about to start going off about the Lone Gunman and Area 51, but bear with me for a moment.
I've always had bad skin. There's really no two ways about it. I have acne. It sucks. After about 10 years, and just about every product on the market, I am at the end of my rope. I've done Proactive, and Neutrogena, every over the counter product shilled by every celebrity out there. I've tried every prescription pill antibiotic, cream, and ointment. They have succeeded in doing little more than make me photosensitive, ruin my clothing, and deplete my bank account.
I always hoped I would just 'grow out of it'. That has yet to happen.
So now I'm at my last resort. It's something I resisted when I was younger. I tend to shy away from medication in general. I would rather try to solve health issues with diet and exercise, instead of resorting to the Big Pharma Drug Pushers. But I'm at the end of my rope.
It's not really about my appearance so much as it is about my comfort. Sure I'd be much happier with the way I look if my skin were clearer, but in the end- and anyone who has ever had severe acne will know- acne hurts. It's painful. Even when I'm not looking in a mirror, I know it's there. And that's the reason I've finally given in.
I decided to go on Accutane.
This was about three months ago. In my naivety I assumed it would be like going on any other medication. Go to the MD; Get a prescription; Fill it; End of story. I knew it had some pretty dramatic side effects- extreme photosensitivity and depression being the two primary ones, not to mention the dry skin- but I didn't think it was that big of a deal.
I don't remember the last time I was that far off base.
The book of required reading for 'Female Patients Who Can Become Pregnant' is about 50 pages long. The vast majority of it is dedicated to educating girls who failed their sex ed classes that sexually active does not mean that if you lay perfectly still you will not become pregnant. The rest of it is about the horrible birth defects your child will have if you get pregnant while on Accutane. I understand that 'knowledge is power', 'knowing is half the battle' and 'the more you know...', but this is overkill.
The other portion of this guide is dedicated to laying out the rules under which this medication will be prescribed to 'Female Patients Who Can Become Pregnant'. This is where we come to the title of my post.
Big Brother is Watching My Uterus (and Big Pharma's Back).
For a doctor to prescribe Accutane (or it's generic partners) a 'Female Patients Who Can Become Pregnant' must be on not one, but two forms of birth control, a primary form and either a second primary form or a secondary form of birth control. Acceptable 'primary' forms of birth control are-
- a hysterectomy
- partner's vasectomy
- iud
- or hormonal birth control- the pill, patch, NuvaRing, Depo, etc.
Secondary forms of birth control are the barrier methods- condoms, diaphragms, sponges, etc. Whatever method of birth control a woman chooses, she must discuss it with her gyn who then has to fill out forms- signed, sealed, delivered- the attest to the fact that this patient has not only received 'contraception counseling' but that the gyn believes the patient will consistently use at least two forms of birth control at all times.
First of all, we're going to ignore the fact that they're listing a hysterectomy as a form of birth control for 'Female Patients Who Can Become Pregnant'. We are not going to ignore the fact that they are listing both an iud and a partner's vasectomy as practical options for birth control for women and girls looking to cure acne. I don't know about you, but I don't know too many 15 year old girls with iud's (many gyn's won't even consider inserting an iud for a woman who has not had a child). I also don't know too many 17 year old boys who have decided, 'you know what, I don't ever want children, I think I'll have a vasectomy'.
So at this point we've narrowed our primary forms of birth control (for your average 13-25 year old) down to just one, the hormonals. Hormonal birth control was revolutionary. It allows women the opportunity to take much greater control over their own sex lives and the decision to have or not have children. Awesome. The Pill Rocks... except when it doesn't.
For some people birth control is the magic pill- lighter periods, less cramping, clear skin and oh, yeah, no babies. For some people birth control is a living hell- nausea, weight gain, mood swings, cramping, not to mention the risk of a stroke. I have been on birth control several times over the course of my sex life, with varying degrees of success. The first time I tolerated the nausea and weight gain (nearly 20 lbs) for well over a year. The second time, on top of the nausea and weight gain I had such violent mood swings that I started to believe I was bipolar.
My doctor changed my prescription and while the mood swings that had made me a terror to live with subsided, I was still unable to lose any weight or control my near constant nausea. When routine thyroid function tests started coming back abnormal I finally said enough is enough. I went off birth control and promptly lost 15 lbs. My thyroid function went back to normal. I swore I would never go back on birth control again. The only thing to recommend birth control? I had clear skin.
Now, 4 years later, at 24 years old, I am left with a difficult choice, give up the right to decide what I put in my own body, or stick with my decision and be denied medication, that, while not necessary, is my sole remaining option. Thinking I could deal with anything for 6 months, I gave up my uterus to government control. I agreed- feeling quite as though I had no other choice- to go back on birth control.
I know this appears a failing on my part. A weakness of will. In part, it is. I don't have the time, energy, or money to fight the FDA. I certainly don't have the time, energy, or money to fight Big Pharma. They have all the power at this point and I have nothing to bargain with. It is of no consequence to them whether or not I take this medication. Had I decided not to, someone else will be happy to shell out 300-600 dollars a month to a pharmaceutical company that has seized control of her reproductive rights.
